Wednesday, September 3, 2008

The USC Dynasty


Many of you are familar with the on-going success of the USC Trojan football team. Every year they re-load with the kind of talent that would give the Miami Dolphins a "hard on". Pete Carroll needs to be commeneded for bringing in such recruits each season. They have a defense that eats away at opposing quarterbacks, receivers with hands made of glue, and running backs that fill fantasy football rosters better than most pros (see Rudi Johnson). The one position he seems to fill better than any other would be at the quarterback spot. Some how, he recruits not only the top prospects in the country, but the hottest ones as well. I mean, these quarterbacks look more like hosts on the E! Channel than they do a college quarterback. I wonder if he takes head shots of his recruits in high school to see if they fit the mold for a the traditional USC football thrower, and if so, where can I get a copy of these head shots.

In recent history, names like Carson Palmer, Matt Leinart, John David Booty, and Mark Sanchez come to mind as hot USC quarterbacks. Leinart for example, pulls more wool than an Amish sweater maker. Who wouldn't like to catch a hard pass from one of these strong, cut, muscular armed men in tight gold pants. If only they could play without helmets! It is getting to the point that girls are wanting their mates to wear Trojan uniforms during "business time"!

Pete Carroll, I commend you. Not only have you produced a winning tradition on the football field, but a tradition of fine quarterbacks that we all love to see on sportscenter each night before we go to bed...thank you (please pass the kleenex)!
I would like to throw out there that any man who read this article and shook your head in argeement with any of this is in fact a true homo. In closing I leave you with one final question, "Where do I sign up for my dream job...to play the center position at this wonderful dynasty?".

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

you should enroll today...
http://www.usc.edu/student-affairs/glbss/links.html

Jlippy said...

Why do you have a picture of Brady Quinn in there? You're as gay as him.

Do you make Pugh wear a Matt Leinart jersey around the house still and practice snapping it to him?